Wednesday, February 03, 2016

Making some progress...



Now that the DEIVF cat is out of the bag along with the news about our amazing donated eggs, I can also tell you that we have finally set up our first consultation with the clinic that we’ve chosen in Augusta Georgia.  We’re about 8 weeks out, but that’s perfect for what we were looking for anyway.  We set the appointment for Monday March 21stso we have plenty of time to make our travel plans and more time to take a break before we start.


Last week our donor had a pretty big scare.  She was having intense pain in her uterus and found out she had an ectopic pregnancy and ended up having to have her left tube removed.  I felt terrible for her as I know how hard pregnancy loss is.  She is recovering well because she’s such a trooper and she has an amazing husband, kids, mother, & friends taking great care of her!  Please send lots of good get-well vibes her way!  She has decided that she wants to continue down the donor path with us, despite her current situation.  I am so thankful for that, but I want her to have the time she needs to recover both physically and emotionally so I’m hoping that over these next couple months she will be able to do that.


Since we have to travel to Georgia for this cycle we are trying to figure out the best way to go about it.  We are highly considering taking the bike for this first trip.  It’s about a 12 hour drive in the car so on a bike we will have to add a couple more hours for gassing up, stretching, eating, etc. but we are really hoping to make this work for us.  Any future trips after our consultation would have to either be by flight or car because after an embryo transfer I don’t think the doctor would recommend me being on the back of a bike for 2 days!  We really enjoy traveling on our bike so this would be a good, last hoorah for me before we hopefully finally become pregnant!  We aren’t 100% sure if it will work out but we are going to try to map out a route & see if we can do it. 


Now comes the hard part, the lull between now and our appointment.  We’re looking at just under 7 weeks.  I know the time will fly and I’m going to try really hard to occupy myself with other things during that time.  My biggest goal over the next 7 weeks is to drastically cut my spending.  Now that this has become a solid reality for us, I am attempting to buckle down on all impulsive/unnecessary spending.  This means clothes, going out to eat excessively, and other miscellaneous spending.  Luckily we don’t have many commitments at all this month or next that would require an excessive spending.  I think Valentine’s Day dinner is about the only thing we may spend much on.  I’m giving up the Winter Wine Walk (about $25), we are foregoing gifts for Valentine’s Day, and instead of getting a full highlight, I’m only getting a partial.  I don’t want to take all the fun out of life, but there’s certainly room for improvement!


Sometimes I sit back and cannot believe that this is our reality.  It is extremely painful to think that I may never know what MY child would look and be like, that another woman’s eggs will work with my husbands, but mine won’t, that my line of DNA is coming to an end (I have am the only child of my mother & father and only have a half-brother).   It is a very hard thing to work through, but I have felt for a while that this would be the path we would travel.  I will stay optimistic that maybe one day I will have a biological child of my own, but that is of little importance to me now.  Infertility comes with so many emotions, but DEIVF comes with even more and I can see why some may never choose this path if it were the only option.  For now I am welcoming everything about this DEIVF process with open arms and a positive outlook because this may be the only way that we can grow our family and I am so thankful that this is even an option. 


I am so appreciative of all of the love and support that we have gotten as we announced our news that this is our new path.  We are so grateful and blessed to have such an amazing team behind us and again, we are so unbelievably thankful for our sweet donor & her family for giving us this beautiful gift of life.

13 comments:

  1. This time will fly by!! I am so excited to follow along and many prayers for your donors recovery.

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  2. Time will go by fast!! just wanted to wish you the best of luck and you will be in my prayers god willing this will be your year!!

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  3. Praying for your donor's recovery! So scary! :( But she is doing something amazing and I know that God will bless her for blessing you guys with eggs! Also, I love the idea of a last ride on the bike ;-) Why not! And I cannot wait to keep up with this process, girl!

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  4. Such exciting next steps. I'm sure it is so much to process and sort through, but you're doing an amazing job! Speedy recovery for your donor, and thinking of you guys as you wait out this 7 weeks!

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  5. When it comes to DNA don't think of it just as genetic thing, think of it as a bigger picture. You may not be genetically linked to your child but you still will have carried them for 9 months and you will pass on your beliefs and all the amazing traits you have and honestly that is so much than being their genetic parent! You will be the one who gets to shape them as a person and lead them down the path of life. They will never think of you as anything less than their mother and when they do find out they will be so proud at how hard you fought to have them. That child will be yours regardless if it shares your DNA or not :)

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  6. Oh the time will fly. And I will pray for continued peace of mind and comfort through the entire process. So excited for you!

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  7. Your sweet baby will be such a sweet surprise. I imagine he/she has the chance to favor you despite no DNA connection. I look at so many of my friends who have adopted and I'm amazed at how much they end up favoring their child despite no biological link. God is good that way. I can't wait to see how things go. I'm from GA. It's a lovely place :)

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  8. I have hope that some day you will have a genetic child, but I'm also so excited about the path you are taking now to build your family. Praying for your donor! You will be a mom and you will be a great one!

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  9. I promise once you've been working on the spending a while the impulses go away and not spending is your new habit!

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  10. A bike trip sounds like the perfect last hurrah! I'm so excited for you and the new direction of your journey. I hope the time flies by!

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  11. good luck with cutting down on the spending girl, you can do it! and the bike sounds like a perfect way to travel especially if you won't be able to do it after. i'm sorry about your donor, that is horrible, poor thing. hope she is okay. thinking of you and hope the next 7 weeks fly by (in a good way) and your positive outlook is amazing as always girl.

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  12. I read an article recently about how moms retain some of their babies' DNA inside them forever after carrying them, so you should read it and know that you ARE genetically linked to your baby (though I guess it is more of the baby passing it to you than vice-versa), and I agree that you will pass on traits to him or her like a previous comment said. It is your voice the baby will know, and your womb he/she will grow in and be born of. That is more important than genetics, anyway. I get what you are saying about how that pretty much sucks (it does), but if I had to choose one to give up, I would choose to give up genetics over carrying the child. Good luck, and God Bless! Here is the link: http://lauragraceweldon.com/2012/06/12/mother-child-are-linked-at-the-cellular-level/

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  13. Praying for your donors health as well as a safe trip for you and Joe!

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