tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post3317686249865092389..comments2024-03-28T07:49:49.789-05:00Comments on baby Ridley bump.: The Worst News I've Ever Received... Elena @ baby Ridley bumphttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09850791737975838690noreply@blogger.comBlogger33125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-20779611574248224282015-09-28T10:19:23.110-05:002015-09-28T10:19:23.110-05:00Im reading this now a month later after a blog bre...Im reading this now a month later after a blog break and I have to say, you are so strong, so so strong. Hugs! Kay R.https://www.blogger.com/profile/17616798594879683219noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-10925553502491570272015-08-29T21:35:07.108-05:002015-08-29T21:35:07.108-05:00You have to travel the road that feels right. I kn...You have to travel the road that feels right. I know the internal battles all too well and I'm thinking about you. Lots of love, xoxoSarahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06108451473506718750noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-4676413200230133862015-08-28T15:24:26.148-05:002015-08-28T15:24:26.148-05:00I'm so sorry. I totally understand how you fee...I'm so sorry. I totally understand how you feel about DE. I always told my husband if it came to that point I would rather use donor embryos. I would be okay with my child not having my DNA or his, but not with it having his and someone else's. Maybe I'm weird.<br /><br />Go with your gut. If you want to use your frozen embryos, use them. If you want to supplement and do another fresh cycle, do it. If you want a third opinion, get it. Amyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00585102132829280344noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-16268701952854674262015-08-27T22:24:13.500-05:002015-08-27T22:24:13.500-05:00You already know how sorry I am that you're at...You already know how sorry I am that you're at this crossroads. I'm here for you as a sounding board….whatever you decide. But hoping your frozen embies become your take-home babies. Jessah @ Dreaming of Dimpleshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02945119397487785737noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-29983775092281596222015-08-27T13:35:39.933-05:002015-08-27T13:35:39.933-05:00I'm so so sorry and I wish I had some words of...I'm so so sorry and I wish I had some words of comfort. The emotional pain of IVF is far worse than any of the physical hardships. I think you've gotten some great advice from the comments. Only you know what the best path forward is for you and your family. If you do decide to move forward with a fresh cycle and you want to try a new clinic, CCRM is recognized as the best of the best as many have mentioned and you are probably already aware. But I wanted to mention an in state clinic in case you want to try something closer to home. Check out Advanced Fertility Clinic of Chicago. I think they have the best success rates in state (not that success rates are everything) and I highly recommend them. Best of luck to you! Hoping and praying for you.Chttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04877399848566077924noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-54445078290437418942015-08-26T13:18:30.237-05:002015-08-26T13:18:30.237-05:00I wish I could offer up words of help. I think it&...I wish I could offer up words of help. I think it's maybe time for a 3rd opinion from a new doctor. Don't give up on those remaining eggs (as I know you won't mama bear). Thinking of you constantly <3 xoxoHappily Ever Parkerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02196626265238318051noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-15533794096779774122015-08-22T14:36:20.776-05:002015-08-22T14:36:20.776-05:00Hi Elena. I'm in a pretty similar situation to...Hi Elena. I'm in a pretty similar situation to yours - the news that my third transfer had failed came just a day after your post went up. I've only been through stimming once, out of that we got 6 day-5 blasts but somehow none of them seem to be sticking. <br /><br />I'm pretty shocked your doctor suggested DE so quickly, it sounds more like they messed up your protocal because as you say, how could your egg quality have gone down so much, so quickly? Did he even test your AMH and FSH to confirm his theory? I obviously don't have all the facts but this doctor does not sound right. What if he was wrong, you spent all that money on DE and it turned out to be an autoimmunological issue? I think you've got the right idea to give those remaining 4 eggs a chance first!shaniquanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-23948797642741870042015-08-21T01:02:01.965-05:002015-08-21T01:02:01.965-05:00I'm so sorry you got this news. As if simple I...I'm so sorry you got this news. As if simple IF weren't hard enough. If you have to consider donor eggs, do you have a female relative that could be a donor for you? The baby would totally have your same genetics. You don't have to pay a donor fee. You can waive all sorts of psychological and genetic testing. Just something for you to consider... Best of luck to you. This is tough and I'm keeping you in my thoughts. Lisamarie https://www.blogger.com/profile/10625420457754403806noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-50197655646287398872015-08-20T13:52:17.815-05:002015-08-20T13:52:17.815-05:00Oh sugars! I am just so sorry! My heart breaks f...Oh sugars! I am just so sorry! My heart breaks for you. But you know? You are probably one of the strongest women I know and I just believe with all of my heart that you will receive that miracle baby. I do. I have heard GREAT reviews from the book called, "It all Starts with the Egg." I plan on ordering it myself. Please know that I am praying for you! <br />(and I couldn't do DE either :/)<br /><br />waitingforbabybird.comAnonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11265254522670394237noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-27332629869955866442015-08-20T12:00:20.052-05:002015-08-20T12:00:20.052-05:00I so admire your bravery for sharing every part of...I so admire your bravery for sharing every part of your story. I wish I could say something that would make it better, but that just doesn't exist. I'm praying for wisdom and clarity for you and your husband about the next choices! The Girl who Loved to Writehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11069853342158261301noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-14834009174874384562015-08-20T11:35:00.152-05:002015-08-20T11:35:00.152-05:00You are so amazing for sharing your journey and yo...You are so amazing for sharing your journey and your true feelings. I can feel your pain and anguish through your words. And I am so sorry for the news you received. I know it would be incredibly difficult for me to hear that I wouldn't have my own biological children. And it would definitely be a grieving process for me, to get to using donor eggs. I think it is so smart to explore all the other options if using your own eggs is something you feel strongly about. Donor eggs will still be there (although hopefully you won't get to that point). I hope your old RE lets you explore using supplements to try and improve egg quality.Natalie | Mrs. Janney |https://www.blogger.com/profile/18312142177721655450noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-48365464812958730342015-08-20T10:37:06.177-05:002015-08-20T10:37:06.177-05:00Oh Elena. My heart just breaks for you. I can'...Oh Elena. My heart just breaks for you. I can't even begin to imagine how difficult those words were for your ears to hear. I'm confident you & Joe will make the absolutely best decision for ya'll. It sucks. It's unfair and it is totally crappy. I'm still going to cheer you on. Hoping & praying for you to feel whole again soon. Big hugs.Amanda {Tickled Pink}https://www.blogger.com/profile/16699074699744098387noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-6047602724870497662015-08-20T09:18:44.544-05:002015-08-20T09:18:44.544-05:00I love how much you speak from the heart! You know...I love how much you speak from the heart! You know what is best for your family. I pray, hope, & wish that everything falls into place for you, however that may be!Laura Marie Keenanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16284571727310318210noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-17137797846628256032015-08-20T09:04:04.680-05:002015-08-20T09:04:04.680-05:00oh Elena I am so so sorry. Obviously I have no ide...oh Elena I am so so sorry. Obviously I have no idea what you are going through, but I think I would feel the same with the child not being biologically mine. I really hope you have success with one of your other options, fingers and toes crossed as always xxxxxKristen @ See You In A Porridgehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09592108031437491276noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-698152920306670282015-08-20T08:41:50.830-05:002015-08-20T08:41:50.830-05:00Also, nothing at all against anyone who does DE it...Also, nothing at all against anyone who does DE it just wouldn't be the choice for my husband and I that's all.Amiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04738442092989090297noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-41188492249320375352015-08-20T08:40:48.567-05:002015-08-20T08:40:48.567-05:00I am so sorry for what you are going through Elena...I am so sorry for what you are going through Elena. I certainly didn't think this would be the news you would be getting. I would for sure try the remaining embryos you have because you just never know. I'm with you on the DE situation, I could not do that. I could however consider adoption or embryo adoption because then neither my husband or myself would have a biological attachment. BUT I don't think you are to that point yet. Praying your baby is in those last 4 embryos you have :) Amiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04738442092989090297noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-26982767666523230292015-08-20T08:24:58.300-05:002015-08-20T08:24:58.300-05:00Reading this post hits so very close to home. I wi...Reading this post hits so very close to home. I will start off by saying that I am not a doctor and didn't go to school to become one. With that being said, the exact same thing was told to me. My doctor said he thought it was egg quality and we should consider DE. I couldn't accept that answer from him and felt like he had totally given up on us. I was devastated. In my case (disclaimer, my case only, not saying your are in the same situation), I started researching and found a doctor in another state that strictly dealt with Reproductive Immunology. After starting treatment, we got pregnant when all three of my eggs fertilized during our 7th iui and after numerous ivf failures. I sit back now and think if I truly had "bad quality eggs" what would be the chances that three would fertilize and we ended up with twin girls. <br /><br />Please sit down and really think about all of the information in front of you before proceeding. Don't give up on your dream of being a biological mom. I am thinking of you and hoping that you guys find a answer that helps achieve your dreams and you don't feel like you had to give up anything further to become a mom.<br /><br />I also feel in my heart that you are going to become a mom. I just hate that you have went through all of this to get there. You're a very strong person. You will prevail.Just Thttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06315564549299993908noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-82290713960385626392015-08-20T05:59:33.274-05:002015-08-20T05:59:33.274-05:00As heartbreaking and upsetting as this news is, I ...As heartbreaking and upsetting as this news is, I think you are handling it very well. I agree that you shouldn't give up on your eggs just yet especially since you said your 4 frozen embryos at your previous clinic and that they are good quality. Maybe taking all of this new information from this new doctor and giving that information to your previous doctor and using those embryos could work. I also agree with you that you should start preparing mentally for the possibility of DE. Preparing yourself is the best thing you can do for yourself. Hope for the best and prepare for the unexpected. I don't think I could go through with a DE. I would feel jealous and resentment as well. I think if that ever happens to me, I'll either stick to being a dog mom or consider adoption but who knows what the future holds and who knows how and if our minds will change (or not change). I wish you all the luck in the world.<br /><br />http://dogmomchic.blogspot.com/Dog Mom Chichttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00615848764580017814noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-52337718058433424222015-08-20T02:58:27.444-05:002015-08-20T02:58:27.444-05:00Everything sounded so great with this new Dr. Pray...Everything sounded so great with this new Dr. Praying that your eggs start maturing correctly and it all works out! Hugs! Brooke @ Pieces of the Reese Lifehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17665094602288405297noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-72138215354718063162015-08-20T01:29:37.023-05:002015-08-20T01:29:37.023-05:00My RE had a preference to complete all the embryos...My RE had a preference to complete all the embryos (that are worth transferring) before starting a fresh cycle. What was the reason for using fewer stims? Did you have OHSS with your first cycle? My RE was a bit more conservative as he cited that pregnancy rates weren't higher with higher number of eggs over one dozen. I actually had a better response with lower dose over a longer duration of time. As you had two different cycles, I echo the prior comments to at least get a consult with CCRM. jAllenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06282963869813954232noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-62550179948458987232015-08-19T23:24:53.947-05:002015-08-19T23:24:53.947-05:00Omg! I have never posted on a blog before! Fail an...Omg! I have never posted on a blog before! Fail and fail. First of all I sent it too quickly.. Then I pasted a completely random (but ironically not irrelevant) link. Please forgive the rookie mistakes. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09709441295114464588noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-79428385279431096362015-08-19T23:21:41.888-05:002015-08-19T23:21:41.888-05:00http://www.brit.co/hottest-baby-names-of-2015/?utm...http://www.brit.co/hottest-baby-names-of-2015/?utm_source=facebook.com&utm_medium=social<br /><br />Hey, I'm so drawn to your story because of your determination, transparency, and our stories have some parallels. You've been through so much! First of all, I'm so glad that you're not giving up on your babies on ice. I pray that you can get a successful transfer(s) with those. I hope I'm not out of line to suggest getting a third opinion before moving to donor eggs. And if you can, run (don't walk) to CCRM. Like you, I sought Dr. LdM after a few failed local cycles. His SART data and sales pitch totally had me. But everything else about the cycle was a complete disaster. I cried the whole way to my retrieval trying to work up the courage to just cancel- I wish I would've trusted my gut. I know he has worked miracles for many deserving parents, but not all cases fit his mold. Anyway, I just wanted to give you my (unsolicited) two cents. Wishing you so much peace and clarity as you navigate through this. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09709441295114464588noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-28363361226827442122015-08-19T23:16:41.755-05:002015-08-19T23:16:41.755-05:00This comment has been removed by the author.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09709441295114464588noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-21497550911664894642015-08-19T22:53:11.615-05:002015-08-19T22:53:11.615-05:00Hey Elena. First off- I'm so so so so sorry. M...Hey Elena. First off- I'm so so so so sorry. My heart breaks for you and everything that you are going through. It is seriously unfair and so crappy. <br /><br />I wanted you to know that my dx is the same as yours. DOR officially, but after our IVF cycle they were able to confirm that it was a "quality" and not a "quantity" issue. I wanted to be sure to suggest to you the book, "It starts with the egg". I read it and do think it made a difference(meaning, paired with my naturopath I got pregnant on my own- shock of all shocks) I think paired with your option two plans it could really make a difference for you and definitely think you should try that route. <br /><br />Also, if you don't want to go the DE route, you could consider embryo adoption. I know that isn't probably something you want to consider right now, but it could be a good option for you later down the road. Xo.Courtneyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05221846937506796615noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5946060129077736446.post-76810910601111345192015-08-19T22:37:04.127-05:002015-08-19T22:37:04.127-05:00I'm truly sorry you are going through this tou...I'm truly sorry you are going through this tough time. I wouldn't trow in the towel either on your eggs just yet. I've read some blogs of women who try to improve their egg quality and end up with success. Its definitely worth a try. Also transferring your remaining embryos sounds like a great idea. As for you not being comfortable with DE it's completely understandable when we first started fertility treatment J told me the same thing. He wouldn't be ok with donor sperm since he wasn't sure he would be able to connect with a child he knew didn't carry his DNA.JoJohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02412370930767709093noreply@blogger.com