Wednesday, August 07, 2019

Next Steps Towards Expanding Our Family

It took me a lot longer to type this post than I ever expected.  After our two losses last year, one in July and the other in November, I for sure thought we'd have another transfer under our belts come March of this year.  Life kind of threw us (or at least me) for a loop.  Joe decided to start his own drywall business the day after we found out we lost our baby in November.  It was a long time coming but I was definitely surprised.  Then in February Georgia turned 2 and life got a little hectic.  We attempted potty training, we were learning how to run a business of our own, and we had a spirited little toddler in our house that was keeping us on our toes every day.

Eventually I decided to just wait.  I wanted to enjoy our summer season as much as possible with Georgia.  We got her a play set and I knew that we were going to be taking some little trips and just adventuring and exploring as much as possible as a family and I didn't want to take anything away from her and those experiences for a few months.  So I decided that we would just put everything on hold until this fall. 

Fall is truly just around the corner.   For the first time ever in my treatment, I am hesitant to move forward.  I've never ever wanted to wait for anything on this journey.  I always pushed hard to progress quickly through every cycle and every procedure.  Even with our two FET's last year I did them both back to back very quickly, but now that I've taken a break and enjoyed these last several months, I find myself often questioning if one child is all that we really need.  We are so blessed to have her.  There were many times that I doubted if we would ever become parents, but then our donor came into our lives and everything changed.  That is what also reminded me of how important it is to give the other 3 remaining embryos a chance.  We are SOOO lucky to have them and I have to make sure they all get a chance because of the chances we were given by our donor for them to be our children. 

Before we move forward with any transfers I wanted to make sure we covered all of our bases.  After a chemical pregnancy last July and 7w miscarriage in November of a chromosomally normal embryo I wanted some answers.  I know that not all embryos are viable which is what I chalk up our chemical pregnancy to, but our miscarriage was another story.  That embryo actually split in two and maybe that's why it didn't work out, but the test results came back normal so I just felt like we needed to pursue further answers.  I had a second RPL (recurrent pregnancy loss) panel of bloodwork done after our D&C last year which came back normal as I expected it would.  One of the only other tests I could think of that would benefit us that we hadn't done over our years of treatment was an ERA.  An ERA is an Endometrial Receptivity Analysis, it basically evaluates the the endometrial receptivity to prevent implantation failure.  It's often used for people who have had multiple implantation failure or someone like me with a miscarriage of a normal embryo. 

I spoke to my clinic in Georgia and unfortunately they don't do the ERA testing at their clinic.  I decided to reach out to Dr. Roohi Jeelani at Vios Fertility in Chicago, its a relatively newer clinic and I'm only about 2 hours from their offices.  I listened to Dr. Jeelani speak at the Infertile AF Summit in April and she does an amazing job on Instagram of educating her followers as she herself also suffers from infertility.  We spoke through some DM's on Instagram and she helped me get set up at her clinic.  She is amazing and beyond compassionate and I cannot wait to start treatment with her.  

For now the only step we are taking is the ERA.  I've considered moving my embryos back here to Illinois and Dr. Jeelani's clinic will take them, but transfers are a lot cheaper in Georgia and it always gives us and opportunity to see our donor and her family.  I want Georgia to know them and develop a relationship with them as she gets older so it's important to me that we stay close and connected so I'm not sure if we will move them yet.  If we were to move them it would cost us about the same amount (roughly 5k) whether we do the transfer here or in Augusta.  Although the transfer is cheaper at our current clinic ($3025) the cost of travel/accommodations brings it closer to about 5k so it's a decision we will have to think about soon, but at this point in time I'm not quite ready.  I'm definitely taking my time this time around & excited to be checking things off the list little by little and hopefully getting some answers!  We meet with Dr. Jeelani on August 15th for our first consultation! 


  1. Im excited for your consultation and totally hear you on wanting to wait. Im sending good vibes and big hugs to you as you make whatever decision is right for your family. Ill be here for the journey.

    1. thanks so much friend, as always appreciate the support!


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